Kate Godfrey

Monday, February 27, 2006

A Chunk of a Reflective Essay

A wolf only wants to mingle with its own species, though the color of their fur isn’t something they use as a wall. It is interesting how people choose to divide their social group from another resting only on the aspect of what they see. For years when I was a child I could have cared less of what I wore. A common outfit would be what ever was comfortable, a bright yellow T-shirt and sweat pants. At the time I didn’t think this was an issue, however many of the so called “Pretty Girls” would sit in their flock of followers and point at me while they muttered something under their breath. This was a common day at school for me, but for the longest time it seemed to stab any of my social behavior in the eye.
As a young child I spent most of my years in an introverted haze. I would always walk with my head down; and say very little when spoken to. I honestly didn’t think that it was possible for anyone to think that I was pretty, or to actually want to be my friend. It seemed that everyone had their own exclusive club, that they would constantly cater towards and stay bound to it like a lion to its food. Being the shy and awkward one, I decided my only friend would be my paper and a pencil. I loved to draw more than anything else, it was the only way I felt comfortable at expressing my self in an exterior sort of way. Though I never thought to apply this exterior expressiveness to my day to day attire.
When ever I attempted to talk to anyone else I would become blazing red in the face, and want nothing more than to run away. My fear of being looked down upon and hated only grew and grew with time.
I see this kind of behavior still in schools today. There will always be that socially awkward person that never seems to say anything. These are the people that choose to sit in the back of the room, or speak with a shaky voice when they have to read to the class. I find that these people may be incredible individuals, they just don’t really know how to let anyone else see it. For instance, there is this short timid girl with long blonde hair I have seen walking the around school. I have never really talked to her, but I now have her in my art class.
I never would have guessed, but she is a great artist. It seems easy for people like her and I to indulge ourselves in art. We are the kind of people that can’t really take out an easel in public and start painting, because we don't really WANT people to see what we are doing. She reminds me of what I still am deep down.


...Essay continues on, but you will never get to know what happens next. :)